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Tuesday, June 4, 2013

Guest Post:20 years after the autism diagnosis: Autism Files

guest post by Suzanne McRae

Today June 2nd, 2013… it is 20 years later after our son’s autism diagnosis, on this day in 1993.
As I was working in my flower gardens this weekend and I was remembering the year that we had created our first big flower garden at our home and it was the year after our son had been diagnosed with autism. All of a sudden I remembered what date we were… and realized the next day June 2nd was going to be the 20thanniversary of our son’s autism diagnosis, a day where it feels that our life was changed forever in so many ways.
A year ago I wrote a blog post  about his diagnosis, he had just turned 3 years old and just a few weeks ago he had his 23rd birthday.

How is it different for us today than it was for those first 20 years?
We have survived what felt like intense early years. I had so many fears of the unknown for him especially as an adult. I don’t know how it happened, but he’s now a young adult and we got here without fully realizing it. It seemed to happen almost overnight.
Back then life felt like one big roller-coaster ride for so long… so many ups and downs, we were rarely ever coasting it seemed… we were either going upwards at a slower more relaxed page… but mostly it seemed that the ride took us on a downward dive, experiencing what felt like steep high-speed drops. They were painful times to go through. It felt like we had very little control about our situation, like there were no other choices but to hold on for dear life with all we had so we wouldn’t be thrown off the roller-coaster.
Today it no longer feels like we are on a roller-coaster ride. We choose instead to coast through life with our son at the speed that we wish most of the time. I must say that we rarely ever have any speed bumps along the way. The ride is so much smoother. We have learned to navigate life with greater ease. Learning that we could co-create the life we desired for ourselves was such an important stepping stone in helping us get us there. It didn’t happen overnight, but it certainly does feel like we have arrived.
I believe as a family together we have come through to the other end of the autism tunnel. For the longest time I saw no glimmer of light and today all I am able to see is the light. I no longer see the autism tunnel. We have learned as a family how to shine brighter than we ever have and to live life from a much happier and more peaceful place. We are far from perfect or having it all figured out, but the strides we have made is now very clear to us and boy what a feeling that is. Our life feels so different than it did even 4 years ago when he came out of school. With a shift in our focus and also beginning to dream differently for him and our family, it all began to unfold as we saw it with time.
The autism has taught me to let go of so many things over the years. I had to learn to trust God and to trust myself and in the future even when I didn’t know how that would look or what would be available to our son. We are learning to live our life from a happier and more peaceful place and from that place more good things will come, even the things we can’t see yet.
It took me a long time to do this, but eventually I had to learn to disconnect from the things that were driving me over the edge. I could no longer do what didn’t resonate with me anymore. It felt like the fun and joy in my life had been sucked right out of me. The gut-wrenching feelings I experienced all too often were simply trying to show me how to listen to those feelings and learn to trust that they could show me the right way for my son. I had to learn to listen to those feelings, they got so intense I could no longer ignore them. My daughter has been instrumental in teaching me about those gut feelings and what they were trying to tell me. She’s been a powerful influence in my life these past few years as I began to learn to take steps towards trusting and finding my way to my own answers. My husband’s unconditional support all these years has been monumental as well in allowing me to do whatever I felt needed to get done, and this was simply another turn on this journey that he took in stride.
I am now able with greater ease to put my attention and focus on my deepest desires. This has been a lot more fun than how I used to do things. Swimming upstream or against the current so much of the time was never, ever any fun. I am going much more with the flow now, and I am able to attract more of what I wish for in my life because of it.
I rarely ever focus anymore on what anyone else is doing, or what is happening in the autism world. I make conscious efforts to listen to how I feel instead. If it brings me that not so great feeling, I choose for the most part to not go there. If what I wish for my son is slightly different from someone else, I will follow that path that feels right for us instead of not listening to my inner voice. I prefer to keep my energy flowing in the direction that feels right where I know that a world of unlimited possibilities awaits for us and our son.
I have come to realize that our son is showing us what he wants in life. He always believes that what he wants, he can have. He chooses what he loves and eventually, almost always (not quite) it become reality for him. He is teaching us to focus on whatever it is that we want, so we can attract it. He knows that the world is filled with unlimited possibilities when one believes.
autism
Some of the greatest desires that I have for my son is that he always continue to experience an over-abundance of joy and happiness in his life; that he feel loved and supported by those that he is closest to in life; that he be able to get access to all of the opportunities in life that he desires just like us, with no limitations; that he be able to use his gifts and talents and share them with the world. I truly believe that he has many talents that will continue to be revealed. I wish to continue seeing him make his greatest desires a reality and that they continue showing up in his life.
The past 20 years has helped us to grow and be in a place that is much more peaceful, fun and light-hearted. If any of this can give hope to another parent of a special needs child or anyone else for that matter… it is my hope that my journey has been able to do that for you. I didn’t have any of this figured out 20 years ago. It took me a long time to understand that I had the power within me to change. You can do it too. Keep reaching for the feel good feelings and dream the impossible dreams.

12 comments:

Full Spectrum Mama said...

really want to thank you for this. I think most of us accept and love and celebrate ourselves and our children, but worry about the future can squelch that sometimes. So it's a deep sigh of relief to read this. In gratitude.

Full Spectrum Mama said...

I really want to thank you for this. I think most of us accept and love and celebrate outselves and our children, but worry about the future can squelch that sometimes. So it's a deep sigh of relief to read this. In gratitude.

Full Spectrum Mama said...

really want to thank you for this. I think most of us accept and love and celebrate ourselves and our children, but worry about the future can squelch that sometimes. So it's a deep sigh of relief to read this. In gratitude.

Unknown said...

I really liked this post! Sometimes I worry so much about my son's autism, and how his future going to be - this kind of posts really give me moral support.
I like this blog as well! I am going to bookmark it! :)
http://autismic.blogspot.com/

Usethebrains Godgiveyou said...

This is nice...I'm 15 years past, and I know just what you are saying. I don't know which of us did the most growing.

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Isabella Math said...

Nothing is not possible in this word.
Herpes I cried out for 8moths had a cure and was making use of the Medication that never wanted a life living on drugs, I applied Antibiotics, he prescribed for me the acyclovir(Zovirax), famciclovir (Famvir), andvalacyclovir (Valtrex).
They never get me cured.
My God keep blessing you and your Family. Dr
ODEY ABANG, your a powerful Herbalist fir your work in my life
I wish you know how I feel inside me when I was making use of does tablets that never could there get me cured. I had to search about some of my favourite blogs when I thought about Dr Odey abang from the testimonies of patients and I remember a friend who told me I should try Dr. Odey Abang herbal medicine. He told me the man can cure me,but was shy and feel its dirty taking in herbs made with African herbalists.
You need to know I would have been cured before now since I knew him then, but still interested in letting you that was my punishment.
Thanks reading my article, feel good and not make my mistake, I love testimonies and explanations of the new beginning is all I hope for
Think about your live and use herbs to get you cured of your challenge on
HIV/Aids
SYPHILIS
DIABETES
CANCER
ALL CAN BE CURED WITH MANY OTHERS BY DR. ODEY ABANG
His email is for you so you speak to him

Odeyabangherbalhome@gmail.com
WhatsApp number +2349015049094

Engr Eric Davis said...

Hello to the word, I'm Engr Eric David, I have confirmed and till now I'll still anouced to the public and the people around me that the best way to get rid of this health challenges is to contact the relaible Herbalist for herbal cures.
I read deaply to have believe and try to made used of the medicine. When I was diagnosed on 10/10/2015, it was only the English prescribed I made use of all through, it was a very big stress for me, I had a friend who introduced me to to the great Herbalist of African, Dr. Odey Abang he's very popular now in my State, Anchorage, Alaska where I lives. I contacted him as my friend directed me to him for a help. Glory to God, my case is settle among many others are My two Cousins, James and John with wife's he cures from HIV/ AIDS, And till now, none of this had been confirmed in us, feel so blessed and happy to be back again as I was being born. I have been diagnosed severally and still shows nothing in us, Dr. Odey Abang is a God's sent Herbalist
You can reach as well as inform your loves ones to get ride of this deathly viruses.
You can reach him in either way
Email-
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God bless

Thomas Vivian said...

Always, anywhere and anytime,I feel very comfortable now all to the work of Dr Odey Abang,the Herbalist who prepare for me the remedies to my health challenges.
I could feel more comfortable when he explained to me how dangerous it's caring Herpes with me getting affected easily with Other sexually transmitted infections. Genital sores increases my risk of transmitting or contracting other sexually transmitted infections, including AIDS.
Newborn infection. ...
Bladder problems. ...
Meningitis. ...
Rectal inflammation (proctitis).
I was so scared when he says that because I found a lover who ran into it and had a shock on me after the checkup and develop stroke.
This has been my earnest prayers for the physician therapist to come in with positive solutions to remedies Herpes and most viral infections. I'm now free and I thank God for leading me to see others getting cured with Herbs. I decided to try and found out that the best way I would have done was to get rid of it and give my testimony. Glory to God I became free after I received his medicine from the DHL and applied as instructed. Till date I had no SYMPTOMS nor virus to detect of me, I called him and thankful for what he did,and ask if he could cure my stroke boyfriend,he said yes and did the same preparation to my boyfriend for his stroke and Recoverd from it. Nothing is impossible with Herbs IN CURES, you're the next if you will be willing to apply his medicine and instructions on how to manage.
Sickness has no right to dwell on us,you can reach him at his email address
For your immediate response to health

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Sierra Nibbe said...

I TESTED POSITIVE TO HIV SINCE 2018

I was told by my doctor that there's no possible cure for it but it can be suppressed with the use of medication!! I felt depressed & sad. I started taking my medication. I felt frustrated, so I tried to seek help online when I came across this website (https://chiefdrluckyherbaltherapy.wordpress.com/) of a doctor called Chief Dr Lucky.  Also I saw a lot of testimonials about him on how he uses natural herbal medicine to cure HIV AIDS and numerous Infections & different kinds of disease as well. So I contacted him and told him my problems after a brief consultation with him. He Prepared and  sent me the herbal medicine and I took it as he instructed me, Then he called me 3weeks after to go and have a check-up!! It brought out testing negative, I felt calm a bit, and the doctors day for more clarity I will have to come back after 1week of which I did and tested negative for the second time !! I am so wow and grateful to this doctor whose medicine has NO SIDE EFFECT, there's no special diet when taking the medicine. He also have cure for 
+HERPES 
+CANCER
+HEPATITIS
+HIV/AIDS
+PCOS
+FIBROID
You can contact him via Email: chiefdrlucky@gmail.com or whatsapp +2348132777335

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